Cops find herd of stolen lighted reindeer

Police in California accidentally found a stash of missing Christmas lawn decorations after responding to a domestic disturbance call.

Officers responded to a routine domestic disturbance report Monday at the home of Vuong Pham, 48, and inside allegedly found a herd of wicker reindeer in the living room, many strings of Christmas lights -- some plugged in, imitation Christmas trees, as well as several snowmen and inflatable Santa Claus figures, The Los Angeles Times reported.

There was allegedly so much Christmas booty inside the home, Officer Cameron Knauerhaze told the newspaper, "We had to use two city trucks and a police truck to take all the property to the police station. This guy had something in every room."

No word as to why this man had such an obsession with Christmas lawn decorations and why he kept his stolen decorations inside the house.

Mean Santa

A Santa in Canada is upset because people are taking pictures of him for free instead of paying fourteen dollars for the pictures that his service uses. He claims that parents are teaching their kids to steal by taking pictures of their kids with Santa with their cell phones or personal cameras and doesn't hesitate to call mall security on these people.

"What message are you sending your children; 'Look Tommy and Sally, see what your parents stole you for Christmas,'" Young said. "This is a private enterprise and these people do this to make a living ... it's really not that expensive."

He said it's free for a child to sit on his lap and talk about presents and wishes, but he doesn't hesitate to ask mall security to stop parents from taking pictures with cell phones and digital cameras. That's led to some people using "four-letter words" and having "tantrums" when asked to stop taking pictures, Young said.

I personally think that taking pictures with your own camera instead of paying $14 for overpriced mall photos is teaching your child to be thrifty. The manager of the mall feels the same way I do, he's said that he'll think about hiring a Santa next year and allowing people to take their own pictures if they wish.

"I'm a grandfather, and if my grandson was on Santa's lap, I'd take a picture," he said.

Good for him!

Is the sand too hot for your toes?

A hotel in Dubai is going to put heat absorbing pipes underneath the sand in their beach so that hotel goers don't have to burn their feet on the hot beach.

The revolutionary beach will sit next to the new Palazzo Versace hotel and will include a system of heat-absorbing pipes built under the sand and giant wind blowers, designed to keep tourists cool in the searing 40-50C heat.

Soheil Abedian, president of Palazzo Versace, said: 'We will suck the heat out of the sand to keep it cool enough to lie on. This is the kind of luxury that top people want.'

Environmentalists predictability are outraged at the impact on climate change this hotel will have with their energy output.

Playspaces for the exceptionally rich sure are extravagant. What will they think of next?

No light sabers for kids

Woolworths department stores in the UK are refusing to sell light sabers to kids under eighteen years old because they apparently look too much like a real gun.

"Some companies are going the whole hog and are banning the sale of any weapon-style products to anyone under the age of 18, even if they are clearly toys like these," said Brandon Cook, who specializes in restricted sales issues for the Trading Standards Institute.

Really? How does a light saber look like a gun? Or a weapon at all. It doesn't even look like a sword or a knife.

Man gets prison for chicken attack

A Michigan man will get three to six years in prison after attacking his mother with a fork and then attacking a woman with ten pounds of frozen chicken.

Prosecutors say McKaney stabbed his mother with a fork at her house and later exchanged words with another woman as he rode a stolen bicycle. They say McKaney hit her in the head with a plastic bag of frozen chicken, opening a wound that required five surgical staples to close.

No word as to why he chose to attack her with chicken rather than a rump roast or celery.

Monkeys in the bath

Apparently these Japanese Snow Monkeys like to take baths in the hot springs and hang out there all year.

Click here for more pictures of cuteness.

Christmas Funeral

A man in England would like to have a Christmas funeral. He would like the pal bearers to be elves and everyone else that attends to dress like Santa.

The coffin will also come equipped with reindeer to pull the makeshift holiday sleigh and a holiday message from Queen Elizabeth II will be played during the ceremony, Park said.

The Mail said an undertaker has estimated the event, which will also include a performance of the song "Merry Xmas Everybody," will cost nearly $104,600.

The man who is 44 and healthy and has said that he wants his funeral attendees to have a good time at his funeral.

The rest of us just think he's weird.

Robber held captive by ghosts

A burglar in Malaysia says that he was held hostage in the house he was trying to rob for three days without food or water.

The man told police that every time he tried to escape, a "supernatural figure" shoved him to the ground.

The owners of the house called the police when they returned from vacation and found him dehydrated.

What a good ghost. I wish I had a ghost that would protect my house from robbers. Sounds much more effective than an alarm system.

CrapWrap

A popular website in the UK is offering a service called CrapWrap charges customers to wrap Christmas presents badly so that their recipients will think they wrapped the presents themselves.

Wrapper Kevin Smith said those who decide to pay for the $5.90 holiday service from Firebox.com will receive a gift wrapped with little or no skill so any individual can claim to have wrapped it themselves, The Mail on Sunday reported.

"I am rubbish," Smith said of his gift-wrapping skills. "We're not given any instructions. I'm just asked to make a hash of it, using lots of brown tape and making sure there are rips and untidy folds."

This service is almost as popular as the websites regular wrapping service as it makes the recipient think that the gift was wrapped by the sender.

Baby Jesus gets GPS

Baby Jesus being stolen from the nativity. It's a crime that happens every Christmas.

One west suburban church is fighting back with a GPS tracker that could lead police, as if guided by a bright star above, directly to the Son of God.

The GPS devices are being offered by BrickHouse Security, a New York-based company lending the hardware and tracking service free of charge to churches and synagogues for the holiday season.

Other churches have installed security cameras to protect their holiday displays.

Stealing the baby Jesus. Sounds funny but really isn't. Those displays are expensive.

Comcast charges man for cable box that started a fire

A man in Florida is upset after receiving a bill from Comcast for his destroyed cable box. The cable box was destroyed after it started a fire.

The fear I felt being wakened by the smell of burning wire, the fear that followed the incident -- and that, to some extent, I still feel -- over the fact that something as innocuous and seemingly harmless as a cable box could set my home ablaze in the middle of the night was apparently of no concern to Comcast.

So, even if the companies defective equipment caused the destruction of said equipment (not to mention the damage to his other property) the company still expects payment for the destroyed equipment.

What an upstanding company.

Who needs a gun when you have a pizza

A pizza delivery guy in Florida escaped from an armed robbery throwing a pizza at the robber.

Devictoria told police he lobbed the pizza at the gunman and heard at least one shot as he fled from the home.

No word on what kind of pizza he threw at the robbers or if the police are recommending that citizens carry pizzas as defensive weapons in the future.

Two teenage boys were arrested later for the armed robber.

Good job UPS

At hiding my boxes. I'm surprised I was even able to know they were there.

Just leave the doormat alone.

Chipmunk strikes again!

A woman in Indiana was irritated when she found that her car's wipers and turn signals weren't working. She opened her hood and found thousands of walnuts.

Wideup thinks it all started last fall when a chipmunk snatched a garden glove from her yard. She later found the glove in the engine compartment when she was trying to repair the broken turn signal. Unable to fix the problem, however, Wideup let the car sit unused for a couple of weeks and then heard a loud revving sound from the engine when she tried to start the vehicle.

Upon opening the hood she found the walnuts.

The chipmunk apparently thought that her car was the perfect hiding spot for his nuts.

Super Soaker Full of Urine

A Minnesota man has been charged with assault after he used a Super Soaker to spray fox urine on a group of teenagers.

The night before, Wagar said, he had been outside on his property near Willmar wearing night vision goggles and spotted a group of 15 to 20 people, the newspaper reported. Wagar, who said he was tired of having his property vandalized by teens scattering toilet paper, grabbed the Super Soaker and fired, the report said.

Then there was a struggle for the gun after he sprayed one of the teenagers.

One father said that Wagar found his son's cell phone and offered to return it for $100, which the man refused. He said that he also took his son to apologize to Wagar only to be screamed at.

It's a struggle that's been played out throughout time. Crotchety Old Man vs. Annoying Kids. I think in this case the Old Man won.

Don't tattoo your name on yourself if you're a criminal

A man in Minnesota thought he'd pulled a fast one on the police when he gave them a fake name.

According to the police report, an officer stopped two men walking in the street at Forest Street and Minnehaha Avenue. One was "evasive" about his identification, telling the officer he had never had a photo ID. He said his name was Darnell Lewis, spokesman Peter Panos said.

The police were not fooled however because he had his last name tattooed on his neck.

Frazier was arrested on four misdemeanor warrants, including driving after license revocation, driving after suspension and no proof of insurance.

He also had at least two felony warrants for his arrest: a probation violation in Jackson County for bringing a stolen vehicle into Minnesota and a failure to appear in Hennepin County on a drug charge.

The man is now residing in prison.

Teenagers in the sink

A group of teenagers have lost their job at KFC after using the dish sink to take a bath and then taking pictures of it for their myspace page.


The photos included captions such as "haha KFC showers!" and "haha we turned on the jets," and were filed under a gallery called "KFC moments," according to the Record Searchlight newspaper in Redding, Calif.

Apparently they'd asked their manager if they could take a bath in the sink and were told no.

That's the way to do well in the workplace, do something that your manager told you not to do and then post the pictures on the internet for the whole world to see.

Pre-chewed pencils?

A company in the UK is selling pre-chewed pencils. The company which calls itself concentrate markets their pencils as a tool to help kids concentrate. That students will not put the pencils in their mouths because they are pre-chewed.

And they say this is a cheap but effective way of encouraging youngsters to get their teeth into their lessons instead.

Concentrate specializes in products to help kids at school and identify why they get distracted or are unable to focus in class, claim the chewed end encourages them to get thinking straight away.

I don't see how a pre-chewed pencil or even a pencil that can't be chewed is really going to help a kid concentrate. Chewing on a pencil (however gross) is a behavior often used by kids when thinking or listening. More of an outlet for the excess energy than a behavior that distracts kids from their work.

Visa looses it's credit card

The CEO of Visa lost his credit cards this morning. He was speaking at a conference this morning when he announced that he had lost his wallet.

"I'm supposed to start off, and say that I'm very happy to be here, and I guess I am. But it's 4:15 in the morning as far as I'm concerned, and I lost my wallet on the way here," Saunders said. "It's rather embarrassing when somebody steals my credit cards." The comment prompted laughter.

I wonder how long it took him to get a replacement card.

Bad Prop Guy

An actor in Austria from the Thalia theater company was injured after stabbing himself in the neck on stage during a suicide scene.

The knife that the actor was using was supposed to be blunted to be used as a prop but had been replaced with a real knife.

Thalia said Thursday that the original prop knife was damaged and that instructions to blunt the replacement had been "carelessly" disregarded. It did not specify who it thought might be responsible

Sounds like a plot from law and order doesn't it? Was it the understudy? The jilted lover? The jealous co-star? Someone that he owed money?

The actor received stitches and was on stage the next day performing the role again, this time with a knife that had been adequately blunted.

It's always a good idea to keep track of your keys

Police in Dearborn Mi responded to a call today by a man who had lost his handcuff key.

He had handcuffed his wife to his bed (in a good way, not in a bad way) and realized too late that he'd lost his handcuff key.

The police were able to free her using a basic universal key.

The police spokesman admitted the incident had "comedic value" but that no crime was committed.

The poor wife. Think she'll let him use the handcuffs again?

Poor Santa

Santa might have to get rabies shots after being bitten by a bobcat.

The PetsMart store was doing a Santa Paws photo event Sunday to benefit the Penny Angel's Beagle Rescue, when a woman walked through the store with an "odd-looking cat," Penny Angel President Joan Kerr said Tuesday. Kerr said she was busy with the dogs up for adoption and did not approach the strange feline, but someone told her it was a bobcat.

The bobcat was apparently scared of the dogs and when they got it on Santa's lap it got out of control biting Santa several times.

By time the picture was developed and a volunteer turned to hand it to the owner, the woman and the cat had disappeared, Kerr said.

"Her last words were 'I have a permit and the cat has all his vaccines,'" Kerr said.

The woman told people in the store that she had bought the cat from a breeder in Wyoming for $1,500 and had it shipped to New Jersey, Kerr said.

Poor Santa. I suspect that the bobcat will not be getting much in his stocking this year.

Deer visits fourth grade students

A fourth grade class in Michigan had an unexpected visitor in their classroom when a six point buck crashed through a window and into their classroom.


The six-point buck sent chairs, desks, books and shards of glass flying. A boy suffered a small cut to his head, but there were no serious injuries


The buck left quickly after he realized that he was not in the woods anymore. No word as to what led the buck to think that the school was worth bashing into. He left part of his antlers behind in the classroom which I'm sure the fourth graders thought was super cool.

The teacher stayed calm and told her class to get to the floor and then got them out of the classroom quickly.

Plastic Surgery for the dead?

There is a new hollywood plastic surgery trend. It doesn't involve the living though and isn't done by a Doctor.

It's for the dead and done by the morticians at the funeral home.

“I’ve had people mention that they want their breasts to look perky when they’re dead,” says David Temrowski, funeral director of Temrowski & Sons Funeral Home in Warren, Mich. “Or they’ll say, ‘Can you get these wrinkles out?’ It’s all in humor, but I think people do think [more] about what they’re going to look like when they’re dead and lying in a casket.”


Still others are so concerned about how they will look dead that they are forgoing the viewing altogether. Now I've never been a fan of viewings because I think they're creepy. But to skip one because you're afraid you'll be too wrinkled or your breasts will be droopy? You're DEAD!

Thoughts on Santa and God from a four year old

I asked the little one in tights (blue spotted ones today) this morning if she was going to tell Santa that she was a good girl.

She told me that Santa knows she's a good girl because he's always watching her.

She then said God is always watching her too.

Which led to the conclusion.

"God is kind of like Santa."

Chuck E Cheese is a dangerous dangerous place

Picture Chuck E Cheese and you think of a place full of screaming kids, germs and pizza, not a place that needs armed guards.

Chuck E Cheese's around the country have often turned into dangerous places.


In Brookfield, Wis., no restaurant has triggered more calls to the police department since last year than Chuck E. Cheese's.

Officers have been called to break up 12 fights, some of them physical, at the child-oriented pizza parlor since January 2007. The biggest melee broke out in April, when an uninvited adult disrupted a child's birthday party. Seven officers arrived and found as many as 40 people knocking over chairs and yelling in front of the restaurant's music stage, where a robotic singing chicken and the chain's namesake mouse perform.

In several cities police officers report that they make more calls to Chuck E Cheese than to local restaurants and even bars.


Law-enforcement officials say alcohol, loud noise, thick crowds and the high emotions of children's birthday parties make the restaurants more prone to disputes than other family entertainment venues.


So basically, drunk people combined with undisciplined kids equals an environment that's prone to problems.



I always knew there was a reason I hated that place.

Do not emotionally abuse your television

A man in the UK has been fined and given an anti social behavior order for yelling at his TV set while drunk.

"Mr Solomon often drinks more than is good for him.

"He will have a drink and will return home.

"Then he will put on the television and if someone on the TV says something that upsets him, he will swear at the TV.

"Drink appears to be the problem - he admits that it's his companion."

His neighbors reported to the police that their children were woken up and were disturbed by the language. The court then enrolled him in a program to help curb his anti-social behavior. Sadly it's not working.

"He has tried very hard to comply with the order.

"He had a lapse in June of this year and he did apologise to the neighbours but there's been a spate in October and November.

"When he isn't drinking and watching TV late at night, he seems to get on with his neighbours."

What's the best way to fix this problem? Ban him from drinking or ban him from watching TV late at night.

Perhaps a breathalyzer attached to his remote?

No red pens teachers, it will make your students sad.

An Australian state government has come up with a set of strategies that teachers should use so they don't harm the self esteem of their students.

The "Good Mental Health Rocks" kit, which was distributed this month to about 30 schools in Queensland state, offers strategies such as "don't mark in red pen (which can be seen as aggressive) - use a different color."

Other tips include structuring time for peer tutoring every day, apologizing to students when necessary and asking students to conduct a "personal skills audit" where they focus on their individual strengths rather than their weaknesses.

Apparently the Australian's missed this study earlier this week that said that teenagers have too much self esteem and really can handle their papers being graded in red pen without feeling like they've been violated.

This makes her a bad mom.

A mother in Detroit was arrested because she held a a sex party at her house that included nineteen prostitutes and two sixteen year old girls one of which was her daughter.

The woman charged $15 per person for admittance to her party with extra being charged for sex. The two teen girls were found dancing nude when officers arrived.

Most of the prostitutes and johns were ticketed and released. The girl's mother was arrested, as were three men involved in operating the party, Evans said. All face charges of operating a house of illegal occupation, and the mother likely will face other charges.

Police said they confiscated three handguns and marijuana, Ecstasy pills and heroin, along with several hundred dollars in cash.

Lets hope she gets a long jail sentence. Teaching your sixteen year old daughter and her friend how to be a prostitute by hosting a drug and sex party should get you several years in jail.

Take caution while kissing

A girl in china has lost most of her hearing after a very passionate kiss ruptured her eardrum causing her to go deaf in her left ear.

'The kiss reduced pressure in the mouth, pulled the eardrum out and caused the breakdown of the ear'

Wow, and I always thought of kissing as a safe activity with the worst thing that could happen was catching a cold. Now we have to worry about going deaf?

In good news she is expected to get her hearing back in two months.

Teenagers' self esteem is too high

A new study has found that teenagers have way too much self esteem.

In short, teenagers think they're great.

Researchers believe that the decades of efforts to boost self-esteem may have created unrealistic expectations in today's youth, and their inflated self-esteem may lead to a sense of entitlement: "I'm great, so I deserve great things."

Despite the popular beliefs, the vast majority of teens are quite satisfied with their bodies, appearance, intelligence, and capabilities. Efforts to instill self-esteem may have done their job too well.

Who'd of thought, teenagers having a sense of entitlement, feeling like the world should revolve around them. I'm sure you're as shocked as I am about that as I've never met a self centered teenager with a huge sense of entitlement who thinks that the world revolves around them.

At least he didn't have a gun

A man in Florida could be facing domestic abuse charges after attacking his girlfriend with a cheeseburger during an argument.

The report said Gonzalez would not let the woman out of the vehicle, so she threw his drink out of the car. In response, the man allegedly grabbed her arm and smashed the cheeseburger into her face. The pair got out of the car, and authorities say the man again took the McDonald's sandwich and put it on her face.

Hopefully he no longer has a girlfriend.

Why play Batman Vs Joker when you can play Bacon vs Tofu

Kids everywhere like to play with superhero action figures. Batman, Spiderman and GI Joe are some of the favorites.

But why buy Spiderman or the Hulk for your little one when you can buy the newest set of action heroes and villains Bacon Vs. Tofu.

Mr. Bacon and Monsieur Tofu are fired up and ready to rumble, but only one can remain at the top of the food chain! Mr. Bacon stands 5-5/8" (14.3 cm) tall and fights for everything salty, greasy and meaty. Monsieur Tofu is 3-3/8" (8.3 cm) tall and represents all things made of coagulated soy milk. The winner gets eaten for dinner!

I can't decide which one is the hero and which is the villain. They both look pretty mean. Tofu looks pretty sinister while Bacon looks pretty evil.

In my house I think bacon would be the hero because bacon is delicious.

Man holds endangered turtle hostage: releases it for $200 and new fishing nets

A fisherman in Vietnam captured a rare Vietnamese turtle who was swept away by a flood. This 150 pound turtle is one of only four rafetus swinhoei species turtles are known to exist.

Fisherman Nguyen Van Toan found the turtle early Wednesday and demanded $1,400 in exchange for its release, arguing that a Hanoi restaurant owner had offered him 30 million Vietnamese dong ($4,800) for the animal.

Turtles are considered a delicacy in Vietnam and other Asian countries.

Toan argued with authorities and conservationists for hours, occasionally picking up a stick to threaten the crowd of about 100 onlookers that gathered in his yard to watch the drama. He finally agreed to accept cash and new nets to replace the ones he ruined capturing the turtle.

The turtle has been allowed to return home and conservationists (and the turtle) are grateful that he did not get turned into soup.

Hopefully the fisherman is able to catch many fish with his new nets and keep his family very comfortable with the profits from those fish.

Teacher suspended for requiring pushups?

A teacher in the UK was suspended because he made late students do pushups.

The Derby Moor Community College secondary school teacher, who was not identified, was suspended by head teacher Wendy Whelan pending an inquiry, after it was disclosed that 11- and 12-year-old students who came late to his class were punished in a variety of ways -- including being forced to do pushups, sit-ups, jumping jacks, and to tell jokes in front of the class.

Of all the things a teacher could be suspended for they suspended a teacher because he was suspected of making kids do pushups or tell jokes? To make it even more absurd the students themselves chose and agreed upon this list of items and were allowed to choose which one they did. The administrators that I've worked with in schools would have praised my originality if I'd used punishments such as this, they sure wouldn't of disciplined a teacher for original discipline.

One parent, who requested anonymity, agreed with Jennison, saying the children in the class did not feel the punishments were inappropriate.

"It's ridiculous. The kids thought it was fun."

Hopefully the teacher will be reinstated soon.

Saved by being overweight

A collie named Jiffy froze to the sidewalk after his owner left him out in sub-freezing temperatures. It is thought that he survived because he was morbidly obese. Shelter workers say that few dogs could survive in single digit temperatures and that it was his many layers of fat that saved his life.

To get him off of the sidewalk shelter workers used warm water to melt the ice and unstick him.

Jiffy's 59-year-old owner was arrested Thursday morning on suspicion of animal neglect, Sheboygan Police Lt. Tim Eirich said. She told police she tried to get the dog inside but couldn't, and instead checked on him every few hours.

So, instead of dragging the dog inside or calling a neighbor to drag the dog inside she allowed the dog to stay outside where he would probably die, that's compounded on the fact that she allowed her dog to become morbidly obese.

It is not known if the dog will face long term effects from the incident.

Is this your thong?

Police in Boulder are looking for the owners of several pairs of stolen underwear. The underwear was found after the police searched the house of a man that was arrested for being a very creepy peeping tom.

Cox, 44, was arrested on Halloween night after he was caught videotaping a Boulder couple having sex inside a home in the 1500 block of 48th Street. He was held down until officers arrived by two neighbors who saw him videotaping the couple through a window, police spokeswoman Sarah Huntley said.

He then tried to erase the video that he made but the neighbors that held him down prevented him from destroying the video.

The video not only contained video of the couple having sex but also contained video of women getting undressed and Cox pleasuring himself in empty bedrooms with women's undergarments.

Eew!

“His ‘M.O.’ appears to be that he breaks into homes, steals underwear, becomes fixated on the woman and returns to videotape them,” Huntley said.

The police are hoping to find the owners of the undergarments so they can investigate break-ins and put this guy in prison for a long time.

Because he's creepy and deserves to be in jail.

Duck Mansions

A hotel in Memphis has spent 200,000 building a home for ducks. Yes, Ducks. Apparently these ducks are famous. They must be to get a 200,000 home.

The picture to the left is not a picture of the hotel. It's a picture of the duck house on top of the hotel.

The 24-by-12-foot enclosure features granite floors, a large viewing window, a scaled-down replica of the hotel and a swimming fountain adorned with two bronze ducks, The (Memphis) Commercial Appeal reported Wednesday.

The picture below is a picture of the duck house on top of the hotel.


I just can't comprehend why the ducks need a 200,000 house. All the ducks that I see here are happy with a pond or a river or a park.

Spending 200,000 on a park would have benefited more than just the ducks. When asked about why they built the house the hotel gave this response.

"It was just due," Kelly Earnest, The Peabody's director of public relations, said of the reasons for building the new duck abode. "We really wanted to build something new and spectacular."

Jason Sensat, the hotel's duck chief, said the birds seem happy in their new home.

The hotel has a duck chief? Really? A duck chief? How much do you think the duck chief gets paid?

Next lesson: Witchcraft

Schoolchildren in India will now be learning about witchcraft (and the superstitions and untruths about it) to try and prevent the murder of hundreds (mostly elderly grandmotherly types) of suspected witches.

In one the most horrific recent cases, a family of four of the Santhal tribe in Assam were stoned and buried alive for allegedly cursing a relative of the village chief. At least one attack in Assam culminated in the severed heads of two “witches” being taken as trophies and paraded in the streets.

The program is being instituted by people who believe that if attitudes and beliefs are changed then these women can be saved. That the way to change is to squelch a belief in black magic. If the community does not believe in black magic then the problem won't exist.

Sounds logical.

However, some academics feel that giving these women pensions would do a better job at getting rid of this problem. They point twards evidence that shows that more people are accused of witchcraft and killed for it in times of hardship.

Raymond Fisman, a professor at Columbia University, told a recent seminar: “In Meatu, there are veritable witch epidemics now and again – certainly any time there is a bad crop year. Witches are the scapegoat of first resort. He suggested that “witches” were killed to make resources stretch farther. “Who are you going to knock off? You want the person who is the greatest consumer of household resources relative to that which they produce . . . it turns out that it’s grandma.”

Thus, the quickest way to eradicate witch-hunts is to introduce pensions for elderly women – to transform grandma from an economic burden to a wealth generator.

Don't kill Grandma!! She's not a Witch, she's old.

Education seems to me to be a good option, but telling someone that something they've always believed is wrong doesn't always work. There are well educated Americans that would tell you that evil things happen because of "dark forces" at work,

Thank you footwear designers

I'd like to thank shoe designers for making furry shoes stylish. From furry boots to furry clogs to furry tennis shoes fur is all the rage for winter.

These shoes are so warm and comfortable and they've even been able to make some that are cute (see the adorable sketchers there) and a furry shoe can be found in any style.

So tomorrow when we have a high of thirty degrees I will pull on my furry booties or my furry boots or my furry clogs and I will be warm, comfortable and fashionable.

Thanks shoe designers for creating a winter shoe that's as comfortable while remaining fashionable as sandals are in the summer.

The things they make animals do at aquarium

You'd never catch an elephant doing this




They're too dignified.

Next at the aquarium, penguins doing the waltz.

This test is brought to you by. . . .

A teacher in California has been selling advertising on his tests to pay for paper to print the tests on. Most of the advertising has come from parents of students in his class who send their kids inspirational messages.

"Tom Farber, a teacher at a Rancho Bernardo high school, said the district cut his annual copying budget to $316 when he needs more than $500 to print enough tests to ensure students receive adequate practice for tough tests they'll take in the future."

Now most teachers as badly paid as they are would just buy the paper themselves. Is there any other job where employees buy their own office supplies?

Mr Farber seems to be a very imaginative teacher when it comes to funding. It's just sad that the state of funding for education is so bad that a teacher has to fundraise for paper.

It disturbs me that people are so gullible

I was just offered a job by e-mail!

Hello,

My name is Priya Awasty, owner of the popular fashion label,Priya Awasty Couture.You can visit my links below to learn more about my kind of fashion and see my lovely designs which I am very sure you will love.
We supply Fabrics & textiles worldwide .We have reached big sales volume in the Europe and now are trying to penetrate the U.S market. Quite soon we will open representative offices or authorized sales centers in the U.S and therefore we are currently looking for people who will assist us in establishing a new distribution network there. The fact is that despite the U.S market being new for us, we already have regular clients.

WHAT YOU NEED TO DO FOR US?
We need agents to receive payment for our garments in cheques or bank wire transfers and to resend the money to us via Money Gram or Western Union Money Transfer.This way we will save money because of tax decreasing.

JOB DESCRIPTION?

1. Receive payment from Clients
2. Cash Payments at your Bank
3. Deduct 10% which will be your percentage/pay on Payment processed.
4. Forward balance after deduction of percentage/pay to any of the offices you will be contacted to send payment to(Payment is to be forwarded either by Money Gram or Western Union Money Transfer).

HOW MUCH WILL YOU EARN?
10% from each operation! For instance: you receive 7000 USD via cheque or wire transfer on our behalf.You will cash the money and keep 700 (10% from 7000 USD) for yourself! At the beginning your commission will equal 10%, though later it will increase up to 12%!

ADVANTAGES

You do not have to go out as you will work as an independent contractor right from your home office.Your job is absolutely legal. You can earn up to 3000-4000 USD monthly depending on time you will spend for this job. You do not need any capital to start.You can do the Work easily without leaving or affecting your present job.The employees who make efforts and work hard have a strong possibility to become managers. Anyway our employees never leave us because for us, our employees come first.

MAIN REQUIREMENTS
1.18 years or older
2.Legally capable
3.Responsible
4.Ready to work 2-4 hours per week.with PC knowledge e-mail and Internet experience (minimal)And please know that everything is absolutely legal.If you are interested in our offer, please reply with the following information:

Name:
Address(No PO Boxes Allowed please):
City:
State:
Zip Code:
Have you done this kind of work before?

Thanks for your anticipated action.And we hope to hear back from you.
To learn more about Priya Awasty,visit these links:
http://www.bharattextile.com/features/lakme-india-fashion-week/2004/designers/priya_awasty
http://www.bharattextile.com/features/lakme2003/designers/priya_awasty.php
http://www.fdci.org/Events/EventDetails.aspx?evid=26
http://www.telegraphindia.com/1041103/asp/calcutta/story_3956232.asp
http://www.littleindia.com/news/136/ARTICLE/1575/2004-02-05.html

Have a wonderful day.

YOURS FAITHFULLY,
Priya Awasty Couture
1301, woodstock, JP road,
versova, Andheri west, mumbai 400061


Wow! I can make 3000 a month working 2-4 hours a week. All I have to do is give them my bank account number.

Really? People are this stupid? They wouldn't send things like this out if people didn't fall for them.

Death of the Double Cheeseburger

The double cheeseburger is no more. Well, it's not on the dollar menu anymore.

The double cheeseburger is still going to be on the McDonalds menu and it is now going to cost on average 1.19.

There will still however be a double cheeseburger on the dollar menu. The new cheeseburger is called the McDouble.

What you ask is the difference between this McDouble and our departed double cheeseburger? One slice of cheese. It's like a double cheeseburger but with less calories because it has less cheese. Now I had a McDouble today and it tasted exactly the same as a double cheeseburger to me. It certainly wouldn't be worth .19 to get a double cheeseburger over the McDouble.

"The McDouble is 6 cents cheaper to make than the double cheeseburger, but in tests, McDonald's has seen customers opt for the latter sandwich up to 70% of the time, J.P. Morgan analyst John Ivankoe said in a recent research note."

I guess that's because we're creatures of habit or is it because that extra slice of cheese is really worth .19? Now you have to remember when you're being cheap at McDonalds and ordering off the dollar menu to order a McDouble instead of a Double cheeseburger.

Snakes!

A woman in Australia found fourteen baby pythons in her bedroom!

EEk!

"I hate snakes and as I walked backwards and forwards I would see another one," she said. "They were everywhere -- there was one curled around my bedhead, another around the bottom of the chair, and when I went outside there was one in the hallway, another on the railing and another on the step. It was like I was having a nightmare."

She then called a snake catcher (what a job, snake catcher) who caught seven of the snakes, then she had to call him again (doesn't seem that the snake catcher is good at his job) and he caught seven more!

The snake catcher said that he thought the snake got in her bedroom by slithering through an air conditioning vent.

EEK!

Now apparently these snakes lay anywhere from 25 to 30 eggs so there could be more baby snakes to be found.

EEK!

In other horrible news

Women in Paupa New Guinea are killing their male babies to try to end a twenty year long tribal war.

Rona Luke and Kipiyona Belas, from two warring tribes, said male infanticide reduced the cyclical payback violence infamous in Highlands tribal fights.

The women have said that if there are less males in the tribe then the tribe won't be as important. The fights that have lasted up to twenty years and have been started over claims such as sorcery.

"All the womenfolk agreed to have all babies born killed because they have had enough of men engaging in tribal conflicts and bringing misery to them,"

Amazing that in the year 2008 things such as this could happen.

Why you shouldn't stick your head in a strange woman's breasts.

It's never a good idea to stick your head into a strange woman's breasts.

A group of female robbers has been knocking men out, stripping them and robbing them in Uganda. The women knock these men out by smearing their breasts in chloroform.

"You find the person stripped totally naked and everything is taken from him," he said. "And the victim doesn't remember anything. He just remembers being in the act of romancing."

Wonder how these men explain their robbery to the loved ones in their lives. But but, she had really nice boobs. . .

Laser Pointer + Pug = Fun

Curly + laser pointer = Fun

I would like a housecleaning robot

There is a company in Japan that has created a housecleaning robot. The robot that they call AR can do the laundry and the dishes.

“During its introduction to the media on Friday, AR carried a cup and saucer on a tray from a table to the kitchen; collected washing and put it in the washing machine, and swept the floor, moving furniture where necessary.”

Apparently the robot won't be available to the public for around ten years and even then it will probably be too expensive for the average person to buy.

Too bad. I would love a housecleaning robot.