Man gets religious tatoo, runs out without paying

A Texas man had "God only can judge me" tattooed on his arm and then left without paying.

The tattoo artist said the man came in to the shop in the 200 block of West University Drive with some friends and asked for the motto along with the image of praying hands.

The artist completed the work and asked for $200, according to the report. The man handed over a credit card, but the charge was declined by the credit card company. The man waited in the front of the store for a bit with his friends, and the friends slipped away.

Then the man ran out of the store, according to the report.

Stealing a religious tattoo is such a good idea. I'm sure god loves that.

Woman calls 911 because her cows got loose

A Wisconsin woman received a citation for calling 911 to report that her cows had gotten loose.

According to the 911 tapes, Tammy Nuttelman was home alone when seven of her cows got loose.

Nuttelman: "I need some help."
Dispatcher: "What's the problem?"
Nuttelman: "You got to round up all your cowbows there, somewhere. My cows got out and they are in the marsh."

After dispatchers told her twice that this wasn't an emergency and gave her the name and phone number of the town chairman, Nuttelman called back a third time.

Dispatcher: "911. What's the location of your emergency?"
Nuttelman: "Yes, this is a **** emergency! I've got seven ****ing cows out loose maybe going to the ****ing highway!"
Dispatcher: "OK, ma'am."
Nuttelman: "You need to let everybody know there are loose cows out there! They'll probably cause a major ****ing accident, you hear me?!"
Dispatcher: "Ma'am, you need to watch your language, OK?"
Nuttelman: "I don't care! I don't need to watch nothing!"

Dodge County Sheriff Todd Nehls says deputies didn't respond to the first calls because the cows weren't causing a hazard.

Dispatcher: "Why are you yelling at me?"
Nuttelman: "Because I tried to call before and you guys said it wasn't a ****ing emergency, and this is!"
Dispatcher: "No, ma'am, it is not an emergency that the cows are in the marsh. We gave you the number for the town chair."

This time, deputies did respond. They gave Nuttelman a citation for improper use of a telephone and abuse of 911.

Nuttelman even asked that a warrant be issued for the cows.

Dodge County communications director Pat Ninmann said dispatchers were trying to handle a serious crash elsewhere in the county at the time.

"Now we get this woman calling us up, swearing at us because we won't come and round up her cattle. You know, the dispatchers do a great job, and they expect some of that but this is completely uncalled for," Ninmann said.

Mooooo! We need a stupid 911 caller hall of fame. You can watch a video of the call here.

Girl tries to strangle her cousin with a bikini top

A Swedish girl tried to strangle her cousin with her bikini top during a fight.

Authorities in Lidkoping said the 17-year-old cousins were sunbathing Friday when one of the girls attempted to strangle the other by pulling her bikini top tight around her neck, The Local reported Monday.

The girl also allegedly bit her cousin and threatened to kill her during the incident, the report said.

I bet the bystanders enjoyed that fight. Nothing says great girl fight like flying tops.

Woman calls police over lost hamster

A woman in the UK called 999 (their version of 911) because her hamster got out of it's cage.

South Yorkshire Police released details of the call to promote the dangers of unnecessary use of the 999 service.

Requesting assistance after making contact with an operator, the woman explained: "It's my hamster. It's got out of its cage. It's gone into the bathroom and down into the floorboards."

She then added: "Is there any chance anyone could come and help me get it out?"

Other nuisance calls included a person complaining about wasps in their garden and others reporting a lack of credit on their mobile phones.

Superintendent Rob Odell confirmed that the force receives around 15,000 non-emergency calls per month.

He warned: "Every second counts in saving someone's life, preventing injury or catching a criminal. You never know when it could be you in desperate need of help and the last thing you need is to lose vital seconds or minutes because someone has called 999 to order a taxi."

Sounds like they've gotten something in common with the US where people call 911 to report that there aren't enough shrimp on their fried rice.

Man ordered to return head of roadkill deer

A court has ordered a Wisconsin man to return the deer head from roadkill he found on the side of the road.

According to the ruling from the 2nd District Court of Appeals, John Longo found a dead deer on the side of the road near his home in February 2008. He loaded it into his truck, took it home and ate it. He had the deer's head mounted and hung it in his home, court documents show.

Longo, now 69, didn't immediately return a message left at a residential listing for him today.

The state Department of Natural Resources gave Longo a ticket in June 2008 for removing a deer carcass from the road without a permit and fined him $208, according to online court records.

Racine County Circuit Judge Allan B. Torhorst found him guilty in a bench trial, online court records showed.

Torhorst fined him $1 and ordered the DNR to give him a permit if the agency didn't retrieve the head by Halloween 2008, the appeals court ruling said.

The DNR argued Torhorst's order was improper. The DNR's chief attorney, Mike Lutz, said the agency felt the deer belonged to the state and judge couldn't order the agency to issue a permit.

Longo never responded to the DNR's appeal, the ruling said. The appeals court found he had abandoned the case, and it decided to reverse Torhorst's decision.

The appeals court sent the case back to the circuit court with orders that Longo return the head to the DNR immediately.

First, why does the state want the deer head? What are they going to do with it? Second, he found a deer on the side of the road and ATE it? EEW!

Assualt with a deadly cheeto

A Tennessee couple were involved in a domestic altercation with Cheetos.

Warrants filed by Cpl. Kevin Roddy, of the Bedford County Sheriff's Department, stated he responded to a call at a home on Pass Road, where 40-year-old James Earl Taylor and Mary S. Childers, 44, were allegedly involved in an argument.

According to Roddy's report, the pair became "involved in a verbal altercation" with each other "at which time Cheetos potato chips were used in the assault."

"There was evidence of the assault," the report read, "however no physical marks on either party and the primary aggressor was unable to be determined."

I wonder if they had orange marks on them. Are Cheetos made of potatoes, the article calls them potato chips?

Statue theifs return

A Michigan town is facing a series of statue thefts.

First, it was the yard gnome. Now, it’s a chef wearing a Dooleys T-shirt.

A 7-foot-tall, 50-pound statue of a chef wearing a white Dooleys shirt was snatched from the rear patio of the restaurant, 12141 Hall Rd., police said today.

The restaurant manager told police the theft occurred between 2:30-6:30 a.m. Wednesday.

The statue is valued at $300, Lt. Luke Riley said.

Two weeks ago, a red gnome was taken from the front yard of a home in the 35000 block of Doyle. The only clue about its whereabouts was a note left on the front door that stated: “Hi, me and Leroy the deer took a walk to check out the area. Be back in a few days — Gnorman.”

I hope the statues are returned soon, and the thief includes a gift with the statues to pay for the anguish that the statue owners have faced.

Prostitute takes box of chips as payment

An Oklahoma woman accepted a box of chips as payment for her services as a prostitute.

Police said Lahoma Sue Smith, 35, admitted to making the deal with the man, who said he was a Frito-Lay employee.

Officers found Smith and the man, both partially clothed, inside Smith's car.

The man was not charged and his name hasn't been released.

Smith, who police said has a history of prostitution, was fined $1,142 after entering her plea.

I wonder if she got to keep the chips.

Firefighters respond to fire at their own station

Several firefighters in Hawaii were surprised when they got a call to report to a fire: at their own station caused by food left cooking on the stove.

Fire Capt. Terry Seelig said firefighters left food cooking

when they responded to reports of a traffic crash May 22. They received a second call on their way back from the crash to put out a fire at their own station, the Honolulu Advertiser reported Tuesday.

"The firefighters (at the station) are very chagrined about it," Seelig said. "It goes to show that no one is immune."

Seelig said unattended cooking is one of the top causes of fires locally.

"The fire's cause was attributed to unattended cooking," Seelig said. "We, like everybody else, need to be careful and attentive when cooking."

You'd think that firefighters would be more careful about fire safety wouldn't you?

Man mugged for his sandwich

An Oklahoma man was mugged while waiting for the bus for his bologna sandwich.

Roger Hamilton, 24, told investigators that he was waiting for the bus Wednesday at the Hudson

Street bus station and preparing to put mayonnaise on his sandwich when he noticed a man, described as African-American and in his 30s, staring at him, The Oklahoman reported Friday.

Hamilton said he asked the man if he could help him and the other man responded by punching him in the mouth and running off with the sandwich, which the police report valued at 76 cents.

I could see assaulting someone for a burger or a or sub sandwich but bologna?

Cop pulls gun at McDonalds

A Colorado policeman is in trouble after pulling his gun at a McDonald's employee because it was taking too long to fill his order.

A spokesperson for the Aurora Police Department said they plan to present the case -- now classified as a felony menacing incident -- to the Arapahoe County District Attorney's Office Thursday for possible filing of criminal charges.

Sources familiar with the case, and the fast food worker's account of what happened, say two off-duty Denver police officers placed an order from their car in the early morning hours of May 21. But once at the drive through window, the employee said the men became agitated and angry at how long their food was taking. The men thought they were being ignored, according to contacts familiar with the worker's account. The male clerk then said one of the officer's flashed his police badge and pointed a pistol through the drive through window in a threatening manner, before driving off without paying.

Someone needs anger management training.

Ohio residents get parking tickets for parking in their own driveway

An Ohio mayor sent city officials to write parking tickets for cars parked on gravel driveways.

The tickets are for technically breaking the law that states no one may park on unpaved ground. But suddenly, that seems to apply for their own driveways.

"I just can't reach into my magic box of tricks and get 5-6 grand to pave my driveway," said Charles Robertson, who received a $25 ticket.

When asked about the issue, Mayor Carty Finkbeiner initially defended Sue Frederick, the mayor's Streets, Bridges, and Harbor Commissioner.

"She wouldn't have written the ticket if she didn't think she would be vindicated," said the mayor. "If they broke the law, you write a ticket."

Residents all along Holland Sylvania found their cars ticketed in their own yards.

Not everyone agrees in defending the tickets, however. City Councilman D. Michael Collins collected tickets to attempt to get them rescinded.

"I want this irresponsible activity by city employees going into neighborhoods and just doing something by fiat -- it has to stop," said Collins.

Residents question the motive behind the tickets. Many suspect it's just another way to squeeze out some extra money.

When this theory was presented to the Mayor, he ignored it, asking, "Could I have another question?"

Sounds like someone needs to be voted out of office. That's just terribly absurd.

Forger declared not guilty because his work was terrible

An Argentinian who was on trial for forged money was declared not guilty because his forgery work was so bad.

The federal court in Buenos Aires dismissed all charges against Marcos Ribles because of the poor-quality paper and printing of his forging attempts, The AP reports.

The 65-year-old had tried to spend a fake 100 Argentine peso (£16) note and a forged $50 (£30) bill.

The court ruled that the notes were "so clumsy and crude [that] they could not be accepted by most people".

Sometimes not doing your best work pays off.

Fox outed as shoe thief

The identity of a shoe thief has been discovered in Germany and it's a fox.

A forest worker stumbled upon shoes strewn near the fox's den and found a trove of footwear down the hole which had recently been stolen overnight from outside locals' front doors.

"There was everything from ladies' shoes to trainers," said a local police spokesman. "We've found between 110 and 120 so far. It seems a vixen stole them for her cubs to play with."

Although many were missing laces, the shoes were in good condition and their owners were delighted to reclaim them, he said, adding that no reprisals were planned against the culprit.

Perhaps the locals could donate their old shoes to the fox as playtoys for her cubs.

Little League Coach uses players to rob store

A little league coach in Washington took several of his players with him when he broke into a vacant store and stole bolts and lights.

Investigators allege that George Spady Jr. was with his son, a nephew and another player from his baseball team when he broke into a vacant shop and took overhead lights and bolts. The boys were encouraged to assist with the break-in, Snohomish County deputy prosecutor Edirin Okoloko wrote in court documents.

Spady, 31, was charged Monday with second-degree burglary, a felony.

Snohomish County sheriff's deputies were called to one of the players' homes after the boy told his stepfather that his coach had taken him along to break into a shop in Arlington, Okoloko wrote.

The stepfather was angry that an adult would use the boys to commit a crime, and, even worse, "that the adult was his son's baseball coach," Okoloko wrote.

The boy told investigators that Spady's son crawled through a vent on the back side of the shop and unlocked the door for his father. Spady, his son and Spady's nephew then went inside and came out with light fixtures and some other items, according to court documents.

The boy told investigators that Spady yelled at him to go inside and grab more from the shop, and told him to hurry up because he saw a truck drive by, Okoloko wrote.

The boy told police he didn't take anything from the shop.

Spady told police he'd driven onto the property to go "four-wheeling" with the boys, Okoloko wrote. He told the sheriff's deputy he didn't see the numerous "No Trespassing" signs posted on the shop, near the driveway and in other locations on the property.

Investigators reported that Spady told them the front door to the shop was unlocked and he couldn't recall if anyone went through a vent to get inside, Okoloko wrote.

Spady was apologetic, the deputy reported.

He admitted taking shop lights and bolts but didn't take anything else; he handed over the lights to the sheriff's deputy. He said he didn't have the bolts with him, according to court documents.

The boys are not expected to be charged with a crime.

In the future the little league should choose coaches that are good role models for it's players.

Dead body is a mannequin

A body that hikers spotted on the side of a cliff in Connecticut turned out to be a mannequin.

Lt. Paul Vance said the object was first spotted and identified as a body Saturday night in West Rock State Park but a specialized ropes team dispatched to the scene Sunday morning discovered the "body" was actually a mannequin, WTNH-TV, New Haven, Conn., reported Monday.

Vance said the State Police Major Crimes Squad was on the scene for about 2 1/2 hours Saturday night and three hours Sunday morning.

I wonder who murdered the mannequin? And what the mannequin did to deserve being thrown off a cliff, perhaps it's an adulterer.

Mr. Clucky has to go

Miami officials are evicting Mr Clucky the bike riding rooster much to the shock of locals.

Last week, Buckley was cited by the city's code enforcement department. It explained the rooster must leave town in seven days. The reason: The city prohibits "the keeping, stabling, or maintaining of livestock."

"It's nuts," says Buckley, who considers the fowl a friend. "He's just a cheerful little animal who likes to bike around and meet people, and he's getting shot down for some insane bureaucratic bullshit. It's like, "Alert! Alert! Oh my God, it's a CHICKEN!"

Says Miami Beach Spokesperson Ivette Diaz: "Buckley can file for an appeal of the citation within ten days of the notice with the Office of the City Clerk."

Around 9 a.m. last Wednesday, there was a knock on the door of Buckley's cozy South Beach pad. He says he found a sheepish code enforcement officer at his front entrance. "He told me: 'Don't shoot the messenger. I love Mr. Clucky.'"

The officer then handed him a $75 ticket. It noted that a resident had seen the duo cycling around town, and complained that Buckley "has a rooster and possible other farm animals." (And the award for Biggest Sourpuss goes to...)

Thing is, Mr. Clucky isn't your typical coop-dwelling critter. He has been a grand marshal at the King Mango Strut Parade, has headlined Miami-Dade Earth Day events, and even won "best activist" in City Link last year. And so, Buckley wonders, shouldn't there be an exception?

The duo is not leaving without a fight. Buckley is drafting a letter to the city and has begun plotting a protest. He says he will "stand up and take down city hall if necessary."

So the man rides around on his bicycle with a rooster named Mr Clucky? Only in Florida.